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brain dribbles

8-12-'xx: 1:17am

i feel absurd. like...all run down and kind of crappy-ish...but it doesn't make any sense, because i haven't really DONE anything that would warrant feeling like this. like, i get run down during the school year because i'm all over the place and i don't get a whole lot of sleep. i guess i haven't gotten a whole lot of sleep the past couple of days...last night i was up really late and had to get up really early and catch the bus. then, i had to ride the damn bus, which just plain makes me sick anyway. i slept from seattle to toppenish, which isn't necessarily a long way but it's a long time, trust me. but that sleep was really unsatisfying...sleep on moving vehicles always is with me...ESPECIALLY busses. i felt all pukey and stuff. then, we went out and blah blah, etc, we got a CD-RW, which is really cool. that part of the day was pretty unimportant (not that the bus ride or...the rest of it for that matter...wasn't). i got pens, too. anyway. but later at home i fell asleep on the couch and when i woke up, i just felt like someone had beaten the shit out of me. achy, groggy, a bit fuzzy in the head. then, i got this extremely painful headache. i was thinking that i might be coming down with something...but that doesn't make any sense. why wouldn't my body be able to fight off some infection? it doesn't have a whole hell of a lot else to do.

and i feel dumb thinking "maybe i should just get a little sleep then." i am SUCH a wuss. i slept a ton today.

i can just see it, though....by the time school comes around, i'll already be worn out. should make for an interesting year. who wants to put bets on how long it takes before i'm on antibiotics and codiene cough syrup? i'm going to try and budget my time more effectively this year but you know me. too many distractions.

i found out today, though, that we are DEFINATELY going to indianapolis. and that not only is the wind ensemble going to perform...but the percussion ensemble, as well! double plus score! so i guess they have to cancel/move the hawaii trip for sure. not to be weird or anything, but i'm actually kind of glad. not that hawaii isn't cool, but i'd rather go somewhere i haven't been before than somewhere i have. i know people who like, visit one cool place and then they just keep going back there all the time because they know it's cool...i'd rather see somewhere new. or something.

i started writing this story and was pulling out a chapter a night for a few days but now i'm kind of stuck. not really because i don't have the plot all formed in my head...and it's not like i'm at a writers block or anything...i just am unable to sit down and write. my brain isn't focused. that bothers me...but i'd rather wait until my mind IS focused than write crappy stuff. the first three chapters actually turned out really well, better than i expected. what story is this, you ask? that's for me to know, and you NOT to.

sigh. i think i'll be bad and not tell anyone i'm home tomorrow. i feel like having a day off. i am SO pathetic.

okay. enough. as i look back at this entry...i can tell that i'm not all here. but at least this comptuer doesn't freeze when i type too fast. and i can do more than one thing at a time...like type and be on the internet or run the CD player. yeeeah.

and one more thing. i am really happy my dad finally decided to replace the air conditioner. now, i can truly not even give a shit how hot it is outside. i hate it when people who have air conditioners complain about how hot it is. as if it even matters to them. i am taking full advantage of this luxury. cool air. mmmm.

and "if i'm not the one" is undoubtedly one of the best songs EVER. EV-ER.

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